I didn’t know

I owned a Tamagotchi

until the evening when

a little flying saucer flew

into my home

& took away my turtle

A physical trainer

at my gym once took me

aside & began asking me

a lot of

philosophical questions.

Like,

***

“How much could I dead lift?”

***

“I don’t know,” I said.

 “Why don’t you ask me this question again, in Heaven!”

***

And then,

in a twinkling of an eye,

I was gone. Never to return.

***

Though I would continue

paying monthly gym fees

for another fourteen years.

Runny

is the

color of

my true

love’s nose.

I betThe roommate from Hell

A bad man

cannot keep a

good man down,

tho’ weighted

sand-bags

will suffice

temporarily

.

---

Why do they call it,

Wonder Bread,

and,

if by asking this,

am I answering my 

own question?

The patrician

side of me

cannot relate

to any of my

plebeian problems.

.

---

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

** The Trefological Calendar begins officially on February the 1st **

Our Founder Shares the good tymes at a local eatery

1. No

2. Nope

3. Uh-Uh

4. Nix on that

5. LOL

.

---

(Available only on TV)

Can relief from

‘chronic dry-eye’

be as simple as

asking to smell

a clown’s boutonniere?

Balloons

continue

to go up

despite

a poor

economy.

I’ve gone though

some rough times

but, don’t worry

about me, folks,

I always land on a cat