Contact info:

Good news!

I’ve secured a seasonal job working

in the dead letter department

of the post office.

So, if any of you would like to get in contact with me,

just write me a letter.

And don’t address it.

ii.

I’ll be sure to get it,

… eventually.


 

0-12

trefology sticker in brooklyn. special thanks to firstofthemohicans

.

If I had a hammer,

I would hammer in the evening,

is exactly why you didn’t want

Pete Seeger as a neighbor.


PROMOTED AD

TREFOLOGY AROUND THE GLOBE!

“I’ve Been Treffing” from the Vintage Toy Advertiser

To read the article click here

Birdvertising

Last night,

I was awoken by a raven

that had flown in through

my open window, and

perched itself atop my book-case.

.

Who is there? I cried.

Let me give you what for!

But t’wasn’t human that answered.

.

Said the raven,

“Dinty Moore”

.

Tell me, bird, I asked.

Are you an omen, or divine?

Is this a message of the future?

 Of what I have in store?

But my plea it went unanswered.

.

Said the raven,

“Dinty Moore”

.

Wait, I said,

as suddenly I knew.

Dinty Moore?

The beef-stew?

.

Is that why you bother me?

Is this what you tout?

Is that why you woke me?

.

Said the raven,

“I’ll show myself out.”

 

part two

 

The next morning,

still in my kerchief & night-gown,

I sat with a cup of coffee at

the breakfast nook;

lit a bowl, & pondered my

passerine pop-in ad.

.

And how, despite the intrusion,

I suppose some beef-stew

did sound pretty good.

.

When suddenly,

there was a tapping at my window.

It was another raven!

This one dressed smart —

.

In a pressed white shirt

with black tie — taut.

On a card table was an e-meter.

.

Said the raven,

“Would you like to see a thought?”

Ghosts of refreshment past

Grandma

told us she would make us

her famous lemonade.

But she didn’t have all the ingredients. So,

she asked us to pray to God for a lemon.

We did,

— but none was forthcoming.

To our surprise, grandma just smiled, winked & said,

she would make lemonade out

of our predicament.

… But none of us were looking to drink

that shit.

 


PROMOTED AD

LIFE IS SHORT. AND SO IS THE NEXT ONE.

Start a career in trefology to-day!

Contact us now at the phone number you think most likely

A girl named, sincerely

I used to know a girl named, Sincerely.

When she moved away,

I tried to write her a letter to

express all the things in my heart.

It was a very short letter.

It began,

Dear Sincerely,

George.

P.S. Alas. It seems, once again,

I have run out of room.

ii.

Then, at the bottom of the letter,

I added a bunch of X’s and O’s.

Telling her,

this is what tic-tac-toe looks like

unbridled by the number sign.


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