I suspect

the only thing

that will

with-stand

a nuclear winter

will be the

cockroaches

& those

smart enough

to earn

their trust.

---

 

my girlfriend

had an

hysterical

pregnancy.

***

But I guess

you had to

be there.

I’m going to go

out on a limb

and ask, why am I

always getting

stuck in trees?

“Land sakes!”

Cried the old woman.

***

High-up in

the crow’s nest

the old woman

squinted through

her spy-glass

***

Some-thing lie ahead, alright.

***

“Land sakes!”

she cried again

***

Below her the ragged

crew gave out a cheer.

***

Granny had

discovered America

The early bird

gets the worm

but the early

worm dies

---

When God closes

one door

He opens another.

It’s the same thing

with windows

& cabinets

  

‘happybirthdaypapa’

The guy to

avoid at a

nudist colony

is the

stilt-walker.

The only game

I was ever

good at was

peek-a-boo

---

.

.

.

.

.

.

I see you!

Just moments

after I was born,

the doctor,

lifting me up to

show to my mother,

***

suddenly, slipped!

***

Loosed from his hands,

I fell towards

the floor

***

The room seemed to drop with me.

***

Then — at the

last moment,

he caught me

***

My whole life passed

before my eyes!

***

I had nearly died.

***

Still —

I remember

thinking —

if I had to do it

all over again,

***

I wouldn’t change a thing.

 

I love to read but I’m an impatient man.

***

I have no time to

wait for wood to be

processed into pulp,

***

then turned into paper,

***

then printed with words,

***

then sold in a store.

***

Just give me a log and I will read that.

***

And, I mean, any kind

of log at all.

Spruce, fir, maple,

I will read anything.

***

Except romance.

***

No romance logs