My wish this
Holiday Season
is for
Peace on Earth.
***
On Earth …
***
Or, on some
other planet.
***
Just so long
as there is
finally peace
***
And, so, from
all of me, to
some of you,
***
I wish a Merry Christmas,
a Happy Holiday,
and a Peaceful New Y’ar
2.
Why would
I be bothered by
visits from
the Ghosts of
Christmas Past,
Present
and Future,
***
when I am
all ready
being visited by
the Ghosts of
Every
Single Day?
I have always
suspected that
my sister was
a changeling,
***
Each time our
mother would
go out
to collect wood,
***
my infant sister
would suddenly,
stand up,
dance about,
play the bag pipes,
drink boiled oil,
and, place empty
walnut shells
around the fire.
***
When our mother
would return,
she’d ask,
“Who drank the boiled oil?”
***
Who do you think?!
Come on, mom, wise up!
2.
“I want It To Rain on Christmas Day”
written & performed
by George J. Raymond
Copyright © 2020
3.
Recorded by my father on an iphone with guitar and drum machine during Christmas of 2020
4.
I want it to rain this Christmas Day
I want the rain to
wash my tears away
***
To all the people I love
who are so far away
I want it to rain on Christmas Day
***
To all the people taken away
from their homes
So afraid of dying alone
***
To all those people
I would like to say
I want it to rain on Christmas Day
***
Oh, if I could only find
Some peace of mind
This Christmastime.
Good news!
I’m writing a book!
***
So far, I have about
a thousand pages.
***
But now, the hard part,
***
I need to start
filling the pages in
with words.
IF ever I needed
to buy
drinking glasses,
I would ask
the clerk to
direct me
toward the
souvenir glass section,
because,
you can take those home for free.
2.
3.
It seems to me
ANY
sandwich
brought
onto a
submarine
is a
submarine
sandwich.
DID you know
that the
people who lived
during the
Middle Ages,
did not
eat sandwiches?
***
That’s a fact.
***
It turns out,
sandwiches
had not been
invented yet.
***
This, despite,
having
ALL
the ingredients
for one.
***
They just ate them all separate.
***
For, you see, back then …
***
First you bit a chunk of bread,
then you bit a chunk of meat,
then you bit a chunk of cheese,
and, then, I assume,
you licked a spoonful of mayonnaise.
***
Then one day,
the Earl of Sandwich
happened by,
took notice of this,
and said,
“I think I can help these idiots”
***
And later,
the Earl opened
a small deli.
***
… And I hear he was quite successful.
***
Finis
2.
Happy 79th Birthday, Mom!
I once strayed
from the
path of success
only to be
attacked by
a werewolf.
“To die,
to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to
meet
Freddy Krueger.”
— Wm. Shakespeare
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
A friend of
mine was
crossing the
street in
Los Angeles
when he
was struck
by a car
and killed.
***
They tell me,
at the time,
he had been
wearing a
“Who farted?” t-shirt.
***
And that, for me, somehow made it worse
***
Because if
movies
have taught
me anything,
***
the clothes you die in, are the clothes you will wear for all eternity.
***
So, now,
not only
will he
never know
who farted
***
but he’ll be forever asking …
2.
Dad.
3.
“Inside-out”
Written & performed by
George J. Raymond (related)
© 2022 all rights reserved
4.
I took myself too
far one day,
and filled up an
empty chamber.
Spun the wheel,
closed my eyes,
almost pulled the
trigger
***
Oh, what a night.
Oh, what a fight.
I went too far.
She took the car.
***
I was alone with
myself, seriously
doubting my
emotional health
***
Help! I cried out
That girl turned me
inside out.
***
Took advantage
of my collapse,
put the pistol in
the freezer
Grabbed some
ice,
a bottle of gin
found me a day
old pizza
***
Oh, what a night …
***
I was alone with myself …
***
Inside out, inside out
Inside out, inside out
Never thought
she’d go and leave me
inside out, inside out.
***
It must have
been the booze, or
something else
I started feeling
better,
grabbed my bike
and hit the road
***
I’ll find her
sooner or later.
***
Rainy night,
I was pretty tight,
ran the light,
never saw the car.
***
I was alone with myself …
t r e f o l o g y 