Grade 1: handling impotence

Abridged from the Grade 1 Workbook © section IV part II




The technology for determining impotence is as such. Step I: The Diminished Male first glues a series of attached stamps onto his Penis before Bedtime. 

Step II: In the morning, if the Anxious Male wakes to find the Stamps are still attached, it can be determined decisively that he Suffers from a case of Impotence, of which there is NO known cure. 

If, on the other hand, the Subtracted Male wakes to find his ‘Meat’* has been surreptitiously Mailed to an Unspecified Location, the males Troubles were all Psychological.

Step III: Write up confession of impotence to Instructor.

Step IV: Wink at pretty girl

That’s it! Congratulations!

Once you have completed this Action the student should move onto

Part III

“To Where Exactly Has My Penis Been Mailed?”

… And I consider this mystery solved after a half-century of research into the Be-Mind


Nov. 12 1969

age 4


*to use the parlance of the day

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