Abridged from the Grade 1 Workbook © section IV part II
SECTION IV PART II
The technology for determining impotence is as such. Step I: The Diminished Male first glues a series of attached stamps onto his Penis before Bedtime.
Step II: In the morning, if the Anxious Male wakes to find the Stamps are still attached, it can be determined decisively that he Suffers from a case of Impotence, of which there is NO known cure.
If, on the other hand, the Subtracted Male wakes to find his ‘Meat’* has been surreptitiously Mailed to an Unspecified Location, the males Troubles were all Psychological.
Step III: Write up confession of impotence to Instructor.
Step IV: Wink at pretty girl
That’s it! Congratulations!
Once you have completed this Action the student should move onto
“To Where Exactly Has My Penis Been Mailed?”
… And I consider this mystery solved after a half-century of research into the Be-Mind
Nov. 12 1969
*to use the parlance of the day