The second option

The idea of posthumous fame

does not bother me.

If it happens that after I’m gone,

invoking my name brings about

a glowing, wish-granting disembodied head.

And it becomes quite popular.

That might be enough for me



A message from Our Founder:

“Bring me your tired, your sleepy, your groggy, your napping.

Everyone is welcome.



Please do not bring me your fast asleep, as I am not running some kind of hotel. 

Unexplained mysteries

A man boards a 727 to Denver.

For reasons he cannot explain,

he immediately exits the plane.

Leaving the terminal, the man

hails down a taxi, telling the driver

to take him to Denver, asap.

A moment later,

the taxi takes off into the air,

crashing into the 727 to Denver.


How did this man know the plane was going to crash?

D8QeUsMXkAAaloY* special thanks to Koala LaFong, for use of the photo

Reminder: Though the Big Bang Theory was cancelled, you can still see the cosmic microwave remnants of it when you turn your tv to static.

Anything is a hat

I believe that any-thing that can

be balanced on one’s head

qualifies as a hat.



See this set of keys?

Now they are my hat.

An armadillo?

Now a hat.


A cracker-crack?

A shnoolzer-sack?

Or, even a fizza-me-gak?

Hat. Hat. Hat.


How about this beret?

… Well, no, maybe not the beret. 

But to be fair,

I don’t think I can personally pull it off.


Still how about this old piece of dried-up dog crap?

Now its my hat!

But you get it.

False notions

Why are we frightened of the ridiculous?

Perhaps, horror movies

and ghost stories

have warped our sense of what is truly

frightening in this world


For instance, in real-life,

a skeleton cannot harm you.

There is no logical reason

to be frightened of a skeleton.

Unless, of course,

you happen to see one is walking toward you.

Then you should probably run.


And, friend,

it doesn’t matter if when you look back

you notice that the skeleton

is still only walking, or,

has even stopped to get a drink of water.

You should run anyway.

There is no telling how relentless

a skeleton might be. 


Do skeleton’s tire easily?

Hell, I don’t know.

Instead of looking to me for answers,

maybe you need to ask yourself,

What did I do to piss off this skeleton?

And while you’re doing that,