I find that if I
fix my attention
on a copy of the
Reader’s Digest
— wholly, and without distraction.
***
I can transport myself
back in time to my
grandmother’s bathroom!
***
It’s all quite fantastic.
And yet, each time
I attempt it, I am
able to remain in the
bathroom a little bit
longer than the time before
***
Perhaps one day
I’ll be able to keep
myself there at will.
***
It is then I will cry out
***
“Grandma, it’s me!
Your Georgie-boy!
I’ve come from the
future to use your toilet!
***
— But don’t open the door yet!”
.
ii. El Fenómeno Ocupado
Keep circulating the URL
t r e f o l o g y 
‘I can transport myself back in time to my grandmother’s toilet’. Now that is neat if anything was ever ‘neat’ ~ Zoolon aka George (and I hate it with a passion when they call me ‘Georgieboy’ but have yet to commit murder over it.)
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hah! I’ve grown accustomed to it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
‘It’s second nature to me now’ if no one has written this I think there might be a lyric here.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ilikeit!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hereby promise never to call you “Georgieboy.” :)
LikeLiked by 2 people
I have been called that, plus ‘Georgie Pawgee’. Hate the both a them, so thank you. ~ Just George
LikeLiked by 2 people
Oh heavens, I know the feeling. Someday if we share a pint or cuppa I can relay the nicknames I had to deal with growing up.
LikeLike
The big question is: Did you ever forget to flush the toilet?
The not-quite-so-big question is: Did you remember to use the synthetic citrus spray after the deed was done?
The least important (but not to be dismissed) question is: Did you put the lid down afterwards out of consideration for your grandmother?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I had one to two seconds tops, man, but yes to everything.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha! My husband’s grandmother collected all the RD Condensed Books.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is a stone cold classic.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Available!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on davidbruceblog #2.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, David!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You have managed to plaster my face with a big grin. Just last week I sat in the dentist’s office and picked up the most current issue of Readers Digest. My first thought was that I was sure they had stop printing them. My second thought was how tiny it was now. As in…really condensed. Then it was just like old times as I read the thing from front to back. It did bring back some memories.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have a subscription to RD from my mom. It is amazing that no matter how current the topic may be from issue to issue it still seems as if it was written in 1952.
LikeLiked by 2 people
It’s true.
LikeLiked by 1 person
A couple things I like. The Readers Digest version of things and time travel
LikeLiked by 1 person